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Food For Thought

6/27/2013

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Last month while spending a few days with B and his family celebrating his dad's birthday in Florida, I unfortunately started coming down with a wicked cold that ended up kicking my ass for about 2 weeks straight.

The first morning I woke up feeling as if I'd swallowed glass B and I took a stroll down the street to CVS to pick up some meds and other various feel-better-fast remedy attempts. While perusing the cough drop selection I confessed to B that while I know they are probably better for you, I really dislike the taste of Ricola and much prefer to happily suck on a sugary Halls Fruit Breezer to temporarily soothe a sore throat. What can I say? My sweet tooth continues to call the shots.

Just as I was explaining my preferences, the cute old man who'd been standing next to us (have I ever told you about my weakness for adorable old men? Another time, perhaps...) began interjecting his humble opinion:

Cute Old Man (COM): You really should use the Ricola's. They are the best for a sore throat.

Me: Oh really? Hmm...yea maybe...

COM: This flavor is good. Here {taking one off the hook}, trust me, I've been taking them for years.

Me: Oh...OK. It's just that I'm kinda a baby with these and really only like the fruity ones {awkward laugh}.

COM: Well then try the ones that have a cherry flavor mixed in {takes another off the hook}. That other stuff is all sugary junk, but these are really what you need.

Me, feeling more childish by the minute: I know, but I feel like I'll just spit it out after a few seconds...

This conversation went back and forth for a few more minutes, me uncomfortably (but with a smile on my face) hemming and hawing and cute old man working his best powers of persuasion (looking like the character from UP and possibly sensing I wanted to hug him).

To summarize, we walked away from cute old man, icky Ricola's in hand, frown on my face.

B, laughing: Why did you do that? You just said how much you dislike those.

Me: I didn't want to hurt his feelings! He was cute and nice.

B, eye rolling: Tricia. That's so dumb. You don't like them! Who cares if he was cute and nice, you are the one with the sore throat!

Me: I care! He was trying to be helpful and I didn't want to make his spirit feel small {dramatic puppy eyes frown}

B, still laughing: His spirit isn't going to feel small you doink and now you are stuck with cough drops, that you paid for, that you don't even like! You're never even going to see that guy again.

...point taken. Ricola's still gross. Throat still sore.

The Food For Thought board quote above made me think of this story today, as well as my general bad habit of not being great with "no" in certain scenarios.

"No" is, without a doubt, a complete sentence. Yet it can be so hard to utter when a huge part of me is  such a giant people pleasing "doink", as B likes to say.  Keeping other's feelings in mind is not a bad habit to have; being mindful in general is a great way to be. But pushing aside your own preferences and right to choices, whether it be in smaller instances like finishing a crappy book...eating at a restaurant with a menu that doesn't knock your socks off...purchasing cough drops that make you gag ...or on a larger scale of staying on a life path against your better judgment, is just...well...doink-ish behavior that paves the way for dissatisfaction, frustration, disappointment and a general heart of boo- hiss-hrumph.

Note to self and TGL family:
Don't be a doink. Say how you feel (as kindly as possible, of course)! Value your time and money and unique, authentic, rocking lifestyle choices! Don't settle. Do what works best for you and never forget to make your own spirit feel big, too.

love and light,

Trish

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about me:
J
ersey girl for the first 18 years of my life, proud Penn State graduate and lover of all things travel, food, the sea, art, cheese, wine, music, dance and my little sister.  I'm a writer and Life + Goal Coach. It's my pleasure to connect with you here.