Sunshine, pool time, BBQ, and beers. Games, laughs, sparklers and...well...more beers.
My birthday weekend was spent in beautiful Sonoma with a handful of fun, generous, and loving friends who made me feel like 1.5 million bucks from start to finish. I truly felt like royalty, with my lovely, hippie girl cover up hand made by my Marm, and my sparkly tiara picked out by some favorite Weeblies. The weather was perfect, the music spot on (thanks, DJ B!), and the company simply divine. It was so much fun, in fact, that I had to take a 30 minute nap at 8pm...just like a little kid who ate too much cake and exhausted herself with giggles on her birthday. Perfection! After releasing my seemingly insatiable need to over-control every minute detail of planning, prepping, worrying about guest happiness, I was able to fully relax, play and receive. And let me tell you, the receiving was good. So good, in fact, that I'm working on a gift guide based on all of the exceptionally creative and thoughtful gifts the folks in my world bestowed upon me. There will be something for everyone, and I'm so excited to post it next week! Thank you so, so very much to all of the people who helped me celebrate. Everyone should feel so lucky and special on their birthdays. I am deeply appreciative of all the kind words, messages, hugs and general good vibes. People truly showed up for me, and I am humbled to the brink of tears (eh, what else is new) to have not only been a witness to, but a recipient of, our shared summer time joy. Oodles of Gratitude, Trish
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It's been a whole day, so I'm basically an expert at 30. Here's what I know: 1. In your thirties, you get really thirsty. Hydration becomes key to your success in all aspects of life more than ever before. I know this to be true because suddenly my desk on any given day looks something like this: 2. You may have learned a lot in your 20's, but there are still many days ahead when you're going to ask yourself some version of what the eff did I do that for? Truth is, you only have to explain yourself to the people who hold your heart, and whose hearts you in turn deeply cherish. Everyone else can pretty much go to.....yea.
3. In your thirties, you'll sometimes still wake up with a fresh pimple on your forehead. This will make you think for a moment that perhaps your skin is more youthful than your age, so you should be oddly thankful for this pimple. You might even feel a bit smug: Ha! How cute am I? With this fresh forehead pimple helping me appear so much younger. Friends, do not be fooled. Because you will then lean in close to your mirror to apply fancy acne cream to the blemished area (you're 30, so you can spend more on things like blemish cream) and you will notice 2-3 new gray hairs have also appeared on your head overnight. This is, indeed, total bullshit. One or the other, I say -- either I am so youthful that I must struggle with teenaged zits, or I am transitioning to a golden time of upping the hours clocked in my hair colorists chair. One. Or. The. Other. 4. In order to change people's lives, you first gotta be willing to be changed. This one came to me the other day as I was thinking (read: worrying) about building up a coaching business, and it hit me right in the gut. Folks will only be ready for beautiful, positive, and vulnerable transformation and connection when you yourself show up ready for the same. *gulp* Let's do this. 5. It's not the quantity of friendships that will make life more full, but the quality of them. Choose good people who help make you good people. iPhones are good places to store these people... Last Friday we took a stroll over to a token SF weekly event, Off the Grid, for some beers and tasty food truck fare. The crowd was generally young, fun and excited to be dining outdoors despite the chill our beloved Bay brings in each evening. It was our first time attending this mini party in our neighborhood, which surprised me to realize considering how long it's been happening.
I've said it before, but an ultimate white girl "problem" of living in such a crazy spectacular city is that there are always so many damn things going on, it's slightly overwhelming (both physically and often financially). But something interesting I've picked up in my coaching courses to help combat this flustery, potentially FOMO inducing, feeling is the simple inquiry of "what are you going to say yes to? and what are you going to say no to?" -- each of equal importance when brainstorming, planning, and then fully living what you truly want. Fact is, to hit the sweetest spots of life, you'll have to say yes to things that kindasortareally scare you. And, you'll have to say no to things that do not serve you--either as a whole, or just for right now, when the mover and shaker pieces of your being have goals and dreams and great joy to reach (and also when the quiet parts of your soul ache to simply be still). When honoring your best life possible, whatever that may look like for you, both yes and no are simply and intricately necessary. What will I say yes to, and what will I say no to? Food for thought, as I head into my 30's... love and light, Trish You guys.... 23/52 was a really good week for me. My supremely supportive circle of friends keeps asking me to share the story of my meeting Tristan Prettyman, my favorite singer, songwriter, blogger of all time (besides Stevie Nicks...omg, can you imagine if Stevie had a blog?! I digress...), but in all honesty I was so happy and flustered to say hi to this hippie-surfer-yogi-fashionista-lover-of-life that I walked away feeling like I made a total dork of myself. You know those moments, right? When you try to replay your nervous interactions with folks in your head and end up saying to yourself, about yourself, something along the lines of: Anyway, for your amusement only do I share what little I remember of this brief but delightful moment: Me, walking up to TP: Hi! You are so beautiful, and I am a sweaty, Jersey, Italian mess right now. (...this story is off to a great start, don't you think?) TP, laughing: Awe girl, I'm sweating too! Me, willing myself to stop sweating: No, no, you have a reason to be, you just performed. I'm just a mess. TP, still laughing. Me: Ok, so I just have to say thank you for being so vulnerable in all that you do, it's so inspiring. TP: Awe, thank you! Me: some other ramblings I don't remember, an awkward joke or two TP, still being polite and listening/laughing: You're so funny! Like a Zoey Deschannel! Me: Oh gosh, you're too sweet. Also, thank you for being a bit of a compass for leading me to this hunky mancake {points to B, who is patiently trying to take our photo}...He took me to see you perform at Christmas time as a surprise, and I knew any guy that will sit besides me singing Madly, Madly, Madly, is someone to hold on to! TP, turning to B and pointing to me: This one is a keeper! Did he put a ring on that finger, yet?! Me: Not yet, but whatevs, he's still dreamy! {jokingly winks and finger-guns at him} OK, I've held you up, would you mind taking a normal photo? ..."normal" photo taken... Then B came over and said "I have to give you a hug!", which she graciously reciprocated while I said...outloud, and to my horror as it was happening..."I always tell him that you're the only person I would understand him leaving me for!". TP: Girl, I'm engaged! Planeguy {fiance's nickname}...He's here tonight, actually! Me: Oh right, right! Of course. Yay, congrats! ...and that's all I remember. In summary: 1. Tristan was as lovely as any fan could hope she'd be. Which, I must say, was so refreshing. 2. Zoey Deschannel is an incredibly kind reference to my awkward. 3. Brandon wins all the boyfriend points for not only accepting all of my ZD awkward-ness, but for celebrating it, too. And after all of that, social media reassured me I didn't make such a bad impression... Pretty f*cking pumped to close out my 20's with that :) Peace, Love and Tacos, Trish PS -- this is cute, even though B looks sleepy (or high?), so I'm sharing: clink clink clink
I'd like to ask that everyone raise their imaginary glasses, so that I may take a moment to say a few words to the beautiful birthday girl.... Because I don't want to wait to say the things we hold in our hearts until some perceived perfect or socially acceptable moment, I'd like to make a toast. Because I don't want to miss the chance...any chance...to let you know how special you are, and to celebrate the joy you bring to so many, I'd like you to know: Sister -- You are captivating. If I close my eyes, I can hear your little voice calling for me down the hall, your clock radio dialed to a country music station, a Berenstain Bear book laying across your lap when I get to your room. I can see the potions created together from mud and leaves in the backyard, and our kiddie pool filled with the cut grass you inevitably dragged in with your tiny toes, even though I begged you to use the pre-pool feet wash-bucket, first. I can smell our freshly bathed Johnson & Johnson skin lounging together on Mom and Dad's bed, one of us holding up the hand mirror at the wicker vanity while Dad gently blow dried our hair, while the other waited her turn, head wrapped in towel, babbling about our day. I can feel the energy of dancing in the living room, asking for "the square song" to be put on one more time, or dressing up so that our poor parents could watch our 18th dance performance to the entire Aladdin soundtrack. I remember so much about growing up with you by my side, and I have loved every minute of it. Even minutes like... Once, when you were in high school and I a college newbie, I remember us being in the car about to leave the mall together. I remember you getting a call from home and I remember the look on your face when you turned to me while blatantly blaming whatever it was you were getting in trouble for (you so rarely got in trouble, you'd think I'd remember) on your big sister. You looked so frantically apologetic, and I could sense the desperate plea of don'tbemadandalsopleasesayyes so clearly that I remember having no choice but to roll my eyes and say "It's fine. I'll get this one". I'd take the fall for you any day, kid. I want you to know that while our sisterhood has always been deeply important to me, I can now say without a shadow of a doubt that it has become the absolute most rewarding relationship of my life. To continue to grow into these chapters of adulthood together--to feel so supported and encouraged by someone who has intimately experienced the same ups and downs of being a family -- is a wonderfully magic thing. And to have you finally, as of just a few years ago, give up resisting my crazy need to always hug and kiss and cuddle you...to win your acceptance and reciprocation of this love language... is a victory I am willing to brag about for days. If there were medals for this, I would wear mine daily. Belle, there are millions of sisters all over the world, and the dynamics of each are unique and so often incredibly beautiful. Some of these sisters are related by blood, while others by pure, vibrant, energy of the heart. And I, birthday girl, hit the jackpot when I got both in you. Love you forever. Cheers, T Like water, indeed.
To be the jellyfish, as B says. Trusting the process and the natural law that all things unfold as they should, so to be here is the most peaceful place we'll find. And then connecting...oh baby, the connecting. How great is that? To be floating freely, experiencing the flow with both a sense of trust and awe...absolute awe. And then connecting with folks who pop up along the way without having to exercise any effort, because it's all serendipity at it's finest -- and to then be brave enough to reach out and actually hold one of these folk's hands, just because. To hold their heart in your heart, to hold space for them in their own flow, even if it doesn't follow exactly with yours. Or recognizing oh my gosh, me too! in one another, and feeling so much better about it all. Maybe they are needing you or you are needing them or maybe it really is just freaking because Jack has had it right all along -- it's always better when we're together. This sea of people. To be in it together, nourishing one another, refreshing the journey and making it a little bit lighter for someone else's swim because, simply, you can. We belong to each other, me and you. And because heartache is the Universal language, we are not so different as we sometimes pretend. What I'm trying to say is: I love this necklace. Thank you, Kim, for taking the time to find something so very "Trish"; for reminding me that the flow is where it all happens. The flow is where the stories we eventually tell our children (when they're old enough, of course) come to fruition and play out in ways where we are left with learning and re-learning, deeply, about what it means to be, have, feel enough. It's what brought me, and kept me, in California. And it has made all the difference. Be like water, my friends. Gratefully, Trish Post red-eye sleepiness/puffiness aside, I love this photo of my baby sis and myself from last week.
After surprising me by taking off work and picking me up when I landed at the bright eyed hour of 6am, this little lady then started our day together with my favorite east coast brekkie of coffee and bagels. We spent the morning at the barn where she rides horses and I was fortunate enough to see her take a few laps around the ring. She's incredible to watch -- so smooth and natural on such powerful creatures. You can sense how deeply this passion has become a part of her very makeup, far beyond just a hobby, and I envy the peaceful energy she exudes as soon as she steps from the car onto the dirt. If I'm honest, I was kind of a mess on this trip. One of my best friends is due with her first child (on my birthday!) and I cried no less than 4 times while hanging out with her. Just glancing at her perfectly pregnant belly sent me into a spin of lovey-dovey emotions, which is saying quite a lot since pregnant bellies typically weird me out. I cried 2-3 times during my trip with Jenny to Philadelphia for our beautiful Noodle's wedding, wanting to hug everyone in attendance regardless of whether I knew them or not (thankfully Jenny was a weepy mess, too -- criers love company, after all). I then fought to stifle tears when my darling Aubrey drove me to see the foundation of her new house being built out, because she would have laughed at me to see my crying and I was attempting to play it cool for once in our 20+ years of friendship. And then I even cried in the car with sister when I tried (and failed) to casually say how proud of her I am. I could barely get the words out, and it felt so important to say them because I am. So, so proud. You guys -- I'm choking up again now just remembering all of these moments. The thing is, there's something about spending time with folks from my non-California days that really hits me in my ultra soft spots. There's something about simply allowing myself to feel whatever is coming up in the most full, intense, and salty ways it wants. When I'm around these women, it feels so damn fulfilling...so safe, loving, and real... that I quite literally bubble up and over. How did I get so lucky?, I think. How do I hold these wonderful relationships, and the energy they give me, inside my heart and carry them with me everywhere? How do I make sure they never doubt my loyalty and commitment to their complete happiness, no matter what that looks like? Seeing each of these beauties grow into strong women--starting families, growing families, following passions, building futures-- brings me much joy. It is an honor to be a part of their journeys, and a blessing to have them woven into mine. In short-- I think I happy-cried so much last weekend because, truthfully, I don't ever want to take these people for granted. I don't want to take any of it...my whole life...for granted. This is a life worth loving on both coasts (and everywhere in between and beyond), because it is so very alive. Grateful hardly feels like the tip of iceberg some days, you know? love and light, Trish |
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